Compassionate Gathering

Questions on Options for Healing

An Independent Assistance Fund can be established with money donated from the church, parishioners, community members who care about survivors, and from survivors themselves. The fund would be independent of the Catholic Church and would be operated by a board consisting of survivors, family members of survivors, and social workers who are not employed by the Catholic Church. This board would meet once a month, take requests for grants of money, discuss the requests, and give out money to survivors for various needs such as help paying past due rent and utility bills, mortgage foreclosure, college tuition, medical bills, therapy, drug and alcohol treatment, or even help paying for summer camp for a survivor’s children. The amount of money given out each time would total a few hundred to a few thousand dollars.

1a. Would you or any of your family members be willing to use such a fund?

Yes

1b. Would you or any of your family members be willing to assist in setting up or serving on the Board of an Independent Assistance Fund?

Yes

One model for helping survivors of trauma heal is mentoring by another survivor further along in the process of healing. Mentors typically validate feelings and experiences and offer their own experiences with coping strategies, therapy, etc.

2a. Would you like to have more information about mentoring?

Yes

2b. Would you be willing to mentor other survivors?

Yes

2c. Would you like to be mentored by another survivor?

Yes

Cathy Shannon is the Victim Assistance Coordinator for the Archdiocese of Portland. She has worked closely with priests who have worked to heal parishes after other priests abused children in those parishes. Some survivors are able to maintain a relationship with the Catholic Church. Others are uncomfortable working with church employees. In some places survivors are able to go to other survivors for assistance in dealing with church employees.

3a. Would you want to have assistance from another survivor to go to the Victim Assistance Coordinator for the Archdiocese of Portland to ask for therapy and other services?

Yes

3b. Would you be willing to assist other survivors when they want to seek help from the Victim Assistance Coordinator but who feel uncomfortable speaking with a church official on their own?

Yes

4. Would you be interested in Spiritual Direction from one of the following?

Priest

Nun

Lay Catholic Spiritual Director

Spiritual Director from another religion

I need more information.

I am not interested in spiritual direction.

Looking at oneself in a retreat may be painful but can also offer an opportunity for growth and healing.

5a. Would you be willing to participate in a retreat?

Yes

5b. What are some things the church could do to make a retreat more interesting to you? Check all that apply.

Trained survivors organizing a retreat.

Therapists experienced working with survivors organizing retreats.

Retreats offered by a non-Catholic organization.

Other (specify)

6a. Would you be willing to share your story to help others inside and outside the Catholic Church understand the damage caused by sexual abuse and the church’s handling of the abuse?

Yes

Yes, but only if I am guaranteed anonymity.

No (If you answer “No,” skip to Question #7.)

6b. How would you be willing to share your story with others? (Check all that apply.)

Photographic display of photos of survivors at the age they were abused--similar to a method SNAP

In a booklet of stories by survivors.

Telling my story to small groups (4 to 6) of supportive Catholic parishioners.

Telling my story to large groups (20 or more) of supportive Catholic parishioners.

Telling my story to a small group of priests along with other survivors. (This has been done in the Archdiocese of Boston.)

Telling my story in a mass during which priests and bishops perform an act of penance for past abuses. (This has been done in the Archdiocese of Boston.)

Telling my story before a large group of priests. (This has been done in the Archdiocese of Philadelphia.)

7a. Would you like Archbishop Vlazny to apologize for the abuse within the Catholic Church? (If the answer is “no”, skip to question #8.)

Yes

7b. What kind of apology would you like to receive? Check all that apply.

A public apology from the pulpit from the Bishop , Archbishop, or Cardinal in the diocese where I was abused or an apology from the pulpit by the head of the religious order of the priest or nun who abused me.

A personal apology from the Bishop, Archbishop, or Cardinal or the head of the religious order of the priest or nun who abused me.

A public apology from the pulpit from my abuser.

A personal apology from my abuser.

7c. What would you want to hear in an apology? Some of the following ideas are based on On Apology by Aaron Lazare.

Statements of responsibility which make clear who are the offenders and who are the offended.

Statements acknowledging clearly the failure of the church to act appropriately to stop abuses for many years.

Statements recognizing the suffering of abuse survivors.

Statements that survivors are not responsible for the abuses.

Assurance that the abuse and the cover-up of abuse will not happen again.

Assurance of some sort of punishment for offenders.

Opportunities for survivors to express their feelings and grieve in a compassionate setting.

A personal apology from my abuser.

A personal apology from the Bishop, Archbishop

8a. Do you want the church to actively advertise support for survivors including retreats, Spiritual Directors, resources for counseling, SNAP support groups, Healing Alliance retreats, mentors, and go-betweens as well as other resources?

Yes

8b. Where would you like to see resources for survivors advertised? Check all that apply.

Church bulletins

Church newspapers such as The Sentinel.

Regular newspapers such as The Oregonian.

Alternative newspapers such as the Willamette Weekly.

Television news stories

Radio news stories

Radio public service announcements

Archdiocesan website

Other (name)

Please contact me, Virginia Jones, at compassion500@aol.com or 503-866-6163 or provide me with contact information if you are interested in helping to implement any of the above options for healing.

Do You have any comments you wish to share about questions 1 through 8?

Abuse survivors often find it difficult to heal without truth and justice. Getting the church to take these actions is difficult. Hopefully, comparing the healing value of various options can help the church see the value in embracing truth and justice.

9. Please rate the following options on how much they would help you heal.

	Very un- helpful	Some- what un- helpful	A littleun- helpful	A little helpful	Some-what helpful	Very helpful
Justice and compensation from the settlement of a lawsuit against the church for sexual abuse.
The church releases some personnel files of selected abusers.
The church releases all personnel files of all abusers who ever served in the archdiocese.
The church names abusers in websites, newspapers, and television news.
The Church writes letters to former parishioners of abusive priests asking if they or their familyabused.
Church leaders publicly apologize for their responsibility for failing to take action on reports of abuse.
Church lobbies politicians to write laws allowing for more time after abuse for survivors to come forward with accusations for charging abusers with crimes.
Church lobbies politicians to write laws allowing for more time after abuse for survivors to come forward and file civil lawsuits for childhood sexual abuse.
Survivors telling their stories to other Catholics in an environment safe from interruption and criticism.
Retreats provided by the Catholic Church.
Retreats provided by non-Catholic spiritual groups.
Retreats organized by survivors.
Spiritual Direction provided by someone in the the Catholic Church(ie. priest, nun, or a lay minister).
Spiritual Direction provided by a non- Catholic spiritual group.
Seeking therapy and support by yourself from a church employed Victim Assistance Coordinator with a choice of church recommended therapists.
Another survivor assisting you when you seek therapy and support from a church employed Victim Assistance Coordinator.
Therapy provided through a church employed Victim Assistance Coordinator with survivor choosing therapist.
Therapy provided through an Independent Assistance Fund run by survivors and social workers not employed by the Catholic Church.
Help with emergencies and other needs including medical emergencies, past due rent, past due utility bills, provided by an Independent Assistance Fund run by survivors and social workers not employed by the Catholic Church.
Mentoring and advice from another survivor on coping with the damage from abuse.
Support group meetings run by the Survivors’ Network of those Abused by Priests.
Attending activities offered by the Healing Alliance or other survivor groups.
The church actively advertising the above sources of support for survivors through church bulletins, church newspapers, and secular media sources.

10. Are there any other issues not covered here that you wish to see included?

11. Would you be interested in participating in a group meeting with other survivors with Archbishop Vlazny and members of the Committee of Parishes and Parishioners to discuss what survivors want and need for healing?

If you said “Yes” please contact Virginia Jones at compassion500@aol.com or 503-866-6163 or provide me with your contact information.

Yes

12. Date you took this survey.

13. Are you a survivor or a family member of a survivor? Family members should fill out the survey the way the survivor would fill out the survey.

Survivor

family member of a survivor

14. Are you male or female?

male

female

15. Do you currently live in Oregon or outside Oregon?

in Oregon

outside Oregon

16. Were you abused in Oregon or outside Oregon?

in Oregon

outside Oregon

17. What is your ethnicity? Check all that apply.

White

Hispanic

Asian

Pacific Pacific Islander

Native American

Mixed race

Black

Other (specify)

18. Have you sued the Catholic Church for sex abuse?

Archdiocese of Portland in Oregon

Another Catholic Diocese

Religious Order

No, I have not sued the Catholic Church for sex abuse (skip to question 21).

19. Did you receive a settlement?

Yes

20. What year did you receive a settlement?

21. Were you abused by any of the following? Check all that apply.

Diocesan Priest

Order Priest

Brother

Nun

A lay employee of the church or a church affiliated organization.

Other, specify

22. At what age were you abused?

23. At what age did you report the abuse?

I never reported the abuse to anyone.

24. Who did you report the abuse to? Check all that apply.

Police

Parents

Other family member

Teacher or school staff member

Priest

Nun

Church employed Victim Assistance Coordinator

Other church staff

Same age friend

Attorney

Other adult, specify relationship

25. Did you feel believed and respected when you reported the abuse?

Yes

26. Did the person you reported the abuse to take action?

Yes

No (If you answer “No,” skip to question 28.)

27. Was this action what you wanted?

Yes

28. Who supported you after you reported the abuse?

a. Check all that apply.

Family member

Friends

Therapist

Attorney

Police

Survivors’ Network of those Abused by Priests

The Healing Alliance

Other Catholic parishioners

Members of a non-Catholic religion

Priest

Nun

Minister from a non-Catholic religion

Church employed Victim Assistance Coordinator

Survivor mentor

Nobody supported me after I reported the abuse.

Other, specify

29. What is your spirituality today?

I don’t believe in God.

I have my own spirituality.

Catholic

Protestant

Buddhist

Muslim

Judaism

Hindu

Other, specify

30. Rate the following options on how much have helped you heal from the abuse.

	Very un- helpful	Some- what un- helpful	Some-what helpful	Very helpful	Did not use
Therapy
Reading books on abuse.
Attending retreats.
Attending healing masses.
Spiritual direction.
Relying on a supportive family member or friend.
Mentor relationship with another survivor.
Suing the church for validation of and compensation for pain and losses.
Relationship with church employed Victim Assistance Coordinator.
Survivors’ Network of those Abused by Priests support group.
Healing Alliance
Other survivor support group
Reliance on spirituality
Other (specify)

31. Do you have any additional Comments?

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